One thing the dinosaurs in the newspaper industry just keep on doing is using phrases and clichés that show just how outside the times they truly are. They quote defunct newspaper comic strips and thirty year-old movies in an effort to connect with the contemporary public, completely unaware that these maxims are no longer valid — they are, at best, like all clichés: wisdom gone stale.

And they wonder why the young people refuse to read newspapers. Damn kids.

The latest, laughable salvo in the “We have to do something about those whippersnappers on the Internet!” war has been fired by the Geriatric Fleet. Please read, “AP Shakes Fist at Google, Tells Internet to Get Off Its Damn Lawn” and ask yourself . . .

“Where’s the beef?”